Katie Francis
Katie, grew up in Downside, NSW (just outside of Wagga Wagga NSW), on a farm with her family, travelled around a bit and now lives in Coolamon NSW.
Katie has primarily worked in community organisations (government and not for profit) supporting vulnerable families with support needs for Justice, family support and disability. She lives with her partner Damien and children Thomas (b 2008) and Piper (b 2017). They have another daughter Lara, who was stillborn on 19th July 2016. Lara was born at 27+3 weeks gestation. We found out the day prior that she had died after calling our OB for a check up as Katie hadn’t been feeling well for a few days. Hearing those words … I’m sorry your baby has died, are the most devastating words we have ever heard. Katie was induced to naturally deliver Lara into the world. After Lara was stillborn, we were devastated, not really knowing anyone else who had experienced this heartbreaking loss and what they needed to do or how to support themselves and their family.
It was all a blur of distraught and heartbreak. We later found out from our Autopsy, that Lara had an issue with her umbilical cord, where it was hyper coiled and one section that had thinned significantly to likely cut off her supply to survive. There are limits to how the cord could be monitored during pregnancy, so was unlikely to have been another outcome for Lara.
Although it raised the issue of knowing to speak up when any changes in movement and feeling occur, a thought that repeats over and over in my head. You just don’t know what you need to know until it’s too late. Many myths are now busted and it is encouraged to always ask if you aren’t sure.
At the time of Lara’s death, we felt supported by the people around us as best that they could, but they had their limit to knowing information we were asking for, we had a huge hole and emptiness on wondering what other supports might be available to help with the process of baby loss and later thoughts on moments we had missed with our baby.
Katie went searching for support and remembered about the comfort remembrance bear she was given at the hospital. This bear had a name on it “Ruby Louise” and in speaking with a friend about this bear, we discovered that Ruby’s mum and I both knew this mutual friend. Ruby’s mother is Megan Gaffney who had provided some remembrance bears to the hospital to support other families after she lost her baby Ruby. Megan and I met, and it was such a special support to connect. Katie and Megan then went in search of more support and were organising a remembrance walk for Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness, and attending a coffee group to support bereaved parents, where they met Anna McRorie & Ruth Hutchins. Through this a special bond was formed with 4 women who had all lost their baby girls and wanted to support each other and others. There were no other local services operating and no other larger organisations that could provide ongoing support to our regional area. This is where Bloss was created.